Skinny Means

Skinny means, you’re better,
You’re the start of something big.
I’m morbid not obese, just holding pounds for
These my brothers, they my dogs, you my feeders
In a most submissive railsonship, I on knees and
Aion fees for pay-‘pon-destination stash
Pornography – charge that wires but not delivers
The kinks I need to beat, the kicks I’m truly looking for,
Abuse I must delete from hard, hard drives and
Map with knives I pick up from brightest corners
Of every room I enter, every chamber I let
Too many vicious pumps explore.

Soon a heart attack will land where heart affairs hit hardest,
Strike where striking matters strike the smartest,
Take no hostages, reveal the brittle arches of my bending
Rib cage, every starter’s habit of not standing straight to
Throw the towel down.

I’m not darkness, just obscurity.
Skinny means I’m pure and flawless,
Only loved when needed,
Only well when fed the seeds of
Taste that puts me down.

Dumb when I catch you staring, no I
Don’t wanna catch you staring I
Don’t wanna see you begging for
Whatever you think I’m hiding.

Inside this head there’s just water,
Just promises of higher and high
Hydroponia. Sex in excess I’ve
Seen retail for under a dollar,
Over the borders of how big others say you can be,
(how much of yourself’s declared publicly).

You’re overweight might die and
Might is must just shy of
The open execution –

We through narrow straws of the
Great White hooking glass,
Contracted mass fit down to a zero point of
Gravely-oriented safety, mock then miss me,
Yes please miss me when you’re shooting
Guns so close to trigger-friendly sanity.

Muscle flex and stag reflex, guys you know but none confess
To such obsessive frailty. Skinny means of feeling closer,
Leaning sharper to abysses of exposure you’ll run into but not
From, doors you’ll not open once you come upon.

Eating like the degradation of the
Never swallow, never full, never truly be let finish.
There’s no baggy hoodie, no skinny jeans can hide
The urge to cut the extra skin like the festered wound
It means to me.

Anxious and regurgitated,
Wearing the pride of always the first to fit,
The last to fit in.

Come whatever we will rise to new heights,
Old weights, new methods of an iron resolution;
Come whatever we won’t break.
The idea is the everything we need to shoot all that burdens,
All that pulls us further down.

Puny and intent on a disappearing effort,
A way to let the world see through me,
And through me feel the jealousy,
The certainty that I must be so
Happy, so
Empty, so
Heavy.

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